This week's message comes from Gina Grove. Gina has members of her family diagnosed with Lewy body dementia, "the second most common type of progressive dementia after Alzheimer's disease, [which] causes a progressive decline in mental abilities. ... In Lewy body dementia, protein deposits, called Lewy bodies, develop in nerve cells in regions of your brain involved in thinking, memory and movement [motor control]" (MayoClinic.org). If you'd like to offer well-wishes or prayers on behalf of Gina and her family, do so by posting a comment in reply to the devotion. (If you're on the page for just this blog post, comment box should appear at the bottom. If you are viewing the website main page showing all recent devotions, at the bottom of the devotion, click on the link that shows number of comments so far; that will take you to the spot for adding your comment.)
Gina's devotion is written for persons in early stages of dementia as they look ahead at the struggles to come in their mental lives.
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When Words Fail
by Gina
Grove
In the same way, the Spirit helps us
in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit
himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. Romans 8:26 (NIV)
Word salad. For someone who’s munched on salad most of my life, this is one I wouldn’t willingly order. Imagine a conversation where each word is a stand-alone piece of lettuce, a hunk of celery, a random cherry tomato. All the pieces are there, but they are tossed and disconnected.
I’ve been told that this is something to expect with my dementia. I’ll know what I want to say, but my brain will scramble the words and syllables. A confused offering of sounds with no apparent meaning will come out of my mouth.
It’s terrifying to think I won’t be able to articulate what I want someone to know. “I love you.” “I wish you could stay longer.” “I miss my sisters so much.” Or that my simple requests will go unheeded: “I need a sweater.” “I’m thirsty.” “The TV is really loud.” My failing mind will send failed messages to my lips.
Loving family members and caring providers will do their best to pick through the pieces of my salad to find meaning. I hope I won’t realize they can’t understand me. Will their non-specific responses of “Mm, hm” and “Really” be enough for me to feel heard and understood?
So who am I if I can’t speak? Who am I if I can’t express my thoughts and feelings? I am still a child of I AM--the God who is and was and is to come. I am a child of the eternal Father, who loved me enough to send Jesus to cry out on my behalf. When I can no longer speak here on earth, my Savior will continue to plead my case before my Father in heaven. “We have Jesus Christ, who has God's full approval. He speaks on our behalf when we come into the presence of the Father. I John 2:1 (GOD'S WORD® Translation)
God has spoken and, by the cross of Christ, I am forgiven. He has promised that this season of confusion is temporary. As horribly scary and frustrating things may become, Jesus has promised that one day I will stand before his throne in heaven, singing loudly and clearly with the angels. My days of word salad will be transformed into the most beautiful songs of praise: "Worthy is the Lamb, who was slain, to receive . . . honor and glory and praise!" Rev. 5:12 (NIV)
Dear Lord, until I get to heaven and sing clear songs of praise to you, comfort my spirit, calm my fearful heart, and keep me close to you. Amen.
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